Gujarat's Kshama Bindu, 24, married herself last week in what is perhaps India's first sologamy or self-marriage, but not as she had planned before. A controversy erupted after Kshama announced her plans to marry herself and a BJP leader said Hinduism doesn't permit such marriages and that the young woman shouldn't be allowed to marry in a temple. Undeterred by the row, Kshama went ahead with the wedding ceremony solemnised at her home, complete with haldi and mehendi rituals, sans priest. She had earlier planned to tie the knot on June 11, but married ahead of schedule, anticipating controversy. There was no priest or temple involved in her marriage.
Meanwhile Kshama thanked all her fans and followers for their support in a video message. "I love you all. I can't describe it in words you have been so kind to me with all the trolls happening taking my side. I have tears of joy reading your messages and stories and I am so excited for my wedding day," she said.
What is sologamy
Sologamy is when a person marries oneself. While more and more people are choosing themselves over a life partner across the world, the trend has just reached India with Kshama's self-marriage.
Taking self love to another level, proponents of sologamy says it's liberating to be married to oneself. "Sologamy refers to a person who is going to marry and spend the rest of their lives with themselves. We have seen instances of it in the TV series Sex and the City where Carrie Bradshaw marries herself. Contrary to popular belief, this relationship is not isolating or lonesome but according to accounts, it is liberating; from the ties that people expect them to be bound to, an expanded sense of self is realized, says Bhoomeeka Jain, Psychologist and relationship expert.
"Calling Sologamy a fad may be wrong in many ways. It's a new way of looking at self-love and individualism or the modified sense of companionship. Perhaps it creates a feeling of contentment and pure, unconditional happiness, and helps one heal and recover from some past experiences," says Jain.
Priya Rajendran, influencer and a blogger says sologamy looks like a fad but may become a concept thanks to the fad. "I would say to "each their own". But for me, it looks like a meaningless expenditure and a double-speak because on one hand, you claim you are against traditions but want to do those same rituals too. A kind of hypocrisy and even a social media publicity stunt!" says Priya.
